landscapes and familyscrapes

Here is my father, snoring beside me. I'm using his laptop. His face relaxes in a way that it doesn't when he is awake. His mouth is open, and his skin is so brown and sun smoothed.

We sailed back down to the mooring this afternoon. I loved the feeling of pushing the rudder against the waves and making the sails taut with wind. Dad uses so many terms I don't know, and it makes me smile, because this is his thing. The thing he loves most. We talked about the beauty of time while you are sailing, and the fact that you are conrolled by the environment, rather than controlling it. All these points to head towards, and ways of navigating and guiding. I never stop wanting to slip off the side into the water to become a fish. Sophie, a girl I met through swimming, and I used to pretend to be fish when we were kids. After lessons and on weekends we would be obsessed with being under water. Even now, sometimes I really wonder if I can breathe under water. At times I have really belived that I can.


"Heroin and ham are in completely different categories"



List of things I need in January:

• litre of latex
• red copper wire
• more wire
• tracing paper
• new eyes
• fabric paint
• adhesive felt
• printed fabric
• paint (acrylic)
• hair dye????? Do I need to have black hair these days?
• glue sticks and pva